Friday 5 for May 1: The most convenient definitions

1. So — so on Monday, what happens?

Quarantine same old same old. Get up, breakfast, shower, shuffle to The Apiary Office, get some work done, do some reading after work.

2. What was that ruckus?

That was me falling up the stairs in my haste to get the office, as I had forgotten I was scheduled to attend a webinar and instead went to take a nap.

Thank goodness part of my brain was like, “You really should check your emails before you totally zonk out.”

3. What do you know about trigonometry?

My ADHD-I kicked in hardcore my Fall Semester of senior year when I took Trigonometry. I was not only attending class to learn, but also borrowing OTHER Trigonometry books from my teacher AND used microscopic type (I think it was 6 points when printed) on my one-page help sheet for the final to pass the class.

Back in Ye Oldene Days, YouTube tutorials weren’t a thing, but you bet your ass had I had access to them back then, I would have used them.

I have since lost all of the Trigonometry I crammed into my brain that semester.

4. Vodka? When do you drink vodka?

I was a gin drinker in my heydey. I still miss the bitter limeyness of a gin and tonic.

5. How’d you like to go fishing this weekend?

I probably should go outside at some point this weekend.


Friday 5 for April 24: Come on in and cover me

1. What are you using for a face covering when you venture out?

Lara made me a home-brew face mask, which was nice. Lara and I haven’t exchanged gifts in a long time. I really need to remedy that.

On Wednesday, my mask from I Heart Guts will be arriving, so I’ll probably be swapping those two when (if) I go out.

This mask and more at the I Heart Guts Threadless site.

2. What’s a recent cover you like of a song you already liked?

Recent? It’s not recent, but I love to jam out to Chet Faker’s cover of No Diggety.

3. How good are you at keeping track of food storage container lids?

As long as they are for our “official” food storage – our glasslocks – we’re good. If they’re from takeout containers we’ve saved, it’s a whole other ball of wax.

4. When did you last cover for someone?

I can’t think of the last time, but I have one that comes to mind immediately when I think about covering.

When we got Rox, it was still in the era of declawing being an acceptable practice (though the tail end). We’d gotten Rox declawed and it was a totally botched job – the vet was about 950 years old, and a total hack. At my mother’s urging, she had me take Rox to another clinic, and then lie my face off about what had happened – for what reason to lie, I don’t know, but I was still a bit of a pushover, so I did.

Vet #2 didn’t believe a single thing coming out of my mouth, but she didn’t call me on it, and she did help. So there’s that.

5. In your residence, what has a special cover?

The record player. And it is To Be Kept Covered At All Times When Not In Use. Them’s the rules, bud.


Friday 5 for April 17: Silver

1. What was the last thing you purchased second-hand?

Right before we all went on lockdown, I was buying a lot of secondhand Chico’s Traveler’s line shirts.

I like them because even though, yes, they are acetate and microplastics, they last for a million years. The one that I originally bought, I purchased in 2008 – so it’s 11 years old – and it still looks as good as I did when I bought it. So, I’m buying a piece that could have ended up in a landfill otherwise and will last forever.

I have about 6 pieces now in my wardrobe. And if I ever get to be seen by the public again, I’ll probably slowly replace more finicky pieces in my wardrobe with new secondhand peices from this line.

2. What’s a dish you cannot resist a second helping of?

Homemade spaghetti. It’s a comfort meal to begin with, so I usually end up eating a pound of cooked pasta in a sitting.

3. How many seconds can you go right now without blinking?

Now that you’re actually asking, zero seconds.

4. Whose second album is much better than their debut album?

Music is not one of my high hobbies, so I had to get a little bit of help with this question.

And though Nirvana is not for me, and I will turn them off whenever they come up on Spotify, I will wholeheartedly agree that Nevermind was the album that not only cemented their credibility as a band, but was a landmark change in music. Period. No one talks about Bleach. Everyone I know in my generation still has Nevermind in their music catalog, even if they never listen to it.

5. What’s something for which you were runner-up?

Any job that I was a candidate for that I lost to anyone else, I suppose. No other discrete times come to mine.


Friday 5 for April 10: Excitement in the domicile

We’ve largely recovered from the tornado, at least here at The Apiary. Charlie fired up and did set up service on the new generator, and now it sits, gassed up and oil changed, in the garage, waiting to be called into service.

But hopefully never needed.

And of course, the weather in Cleveland is going through puberty, so the day after our Wizard of Oz-like adventures, it’s been cold and snowy.

So, onwards to this week’s Friday 5.

1. In what way have you recently been naughty?

Naturalizer was having a pretty solid 40% off sale, so I bought three new pairs of shoes. How bougie can you be during a pandemic?

  • A new pair of black heels to replace the ones I’ve had for at least 12 years, and are looking super ratty.
  • A pair of nude sandals that I can wear with summery dresses.
  • A pair of (beshitted) flats, in the event I wreck my toe (again), and need to wear flats.

2. What’s the closest you’ve been to death-defying these past few weeks?

I left the house on Wednesday to go downtown to the office to actually get work done with the post-tornado power-outtage. In the time of Coronavirus, that’s both the most, and least death-defying one can get.

3. What temptations have you recently resisted?

Let’s talk about what I haven’t resisted temptation-wise — chewing on my fingernails and picking at my toenails. Every single one of my digits looks right now like I manicured them with a belt sander.

4. What’s something you wish you didn’t recently see?

In the tamest sense ever: Charlie loves to turn on the TV and then ignore it. He’ll then dither on his phone, or walk out of the room, start a project, etc. He did it this morning and set the TV to some visually-broadcasted entertainment pox called the Laff Channel, and it was playing “America’s Funniest Videos.”

I ended up “watching” that garbage for a good 15 minutes before I realize that he’d done That Thing He Does and had abandoned me to this entertainment hellscape.

And I say this as someone that fully admits to spending 8 hours yesterday watching Adam Savage’s “Tested”: I want that 15 minutes of my life back.

5. What behavior from others are you excusing nowadays?

Look, I’m non-confrontational to a fault. So, just ignoring the unwashed masses by and large is pretty much status quo right now.


Friday 5 for April 3: AKA March 73rd

Up at the top, I’d mentioned recently about Rox having kidney disease (and, apparently, hypertension). We’ve got her on the prescription food, and added Semintra (at $100/bottle – making her meds the most expensive in the house), and she’s really turned a corner. Eating everything in her dish – which to me, is the biggest change. So, I think we’re in a good spot maintaining the health that she has for now.

So, onwards to this week’s Friday 5.

1. What did you have too much of this week?

Overdosed on the news: Twitter, my feeds, television. I’ve put a moratorium on news at The Apiary to a single news program per day. And it’s usually NBC Nightly News with Lester Holt. Because we both love Lester.

Also, we watched the recent Frontline on plastics recycling, to which we both looked at each other after and asked, “WHY DO WE KEEP TIVO’ING FRONTLINE?! IT ONLY MAKES US MAD!” If there was any good to come of it, I maybe got Charlie on working on more sustainable practices at The Apiary. Maybe.

2. What did you have not enough of this week?

Well, I mean, obviously the opportunity to actually get out of this house.

I did sneak out this morning and go to the post office drive through to mail a letter.

But I’ve also skipped most of the neighborhood walkabouts that Charlie went on. I shouldn’t have ignored as many of them as I did. But here we are.

3. What did you have in just the right amount or number?

I finished The War on Peace earlier this week, and started on You Are Not so Smart. So, the amount of books that I’ve been reading have been just the right amount.

I’m 40% through You Are Not So Smart, and while it’s fine, I may pick at a couple of the chapters on topics I’m not as familiar with and shelve the rest. What with my general feeling of “this country and everything in life sucks,” this book doesn’t do a whole lot to help you feel very good or empowered about your place in society or the universe.

If The Body: A Guide for Occupants is actually available through the library, I’ll pick that one up instead.

4. What’s better today than it was a week ago?

It’s a bad week to ask me, but the weather is better. Sunny and blue skies today, if a little chilly.

5. When they make a movie about last month, what would be a good song for the soundtrack?

It’s the End of the World as We Know It (And I Feel Fine) is a little too on-the-nose.

Let’s go with Broadripple is Burning as a good song to play to get yourself really in your feelings when you feel like everything has gone to shit.